history and reference "i Kissed Your Car": A Father's Day Surprise!

[tomscat1]

Sorry to break your bubble guys. 

 

I was recently at a high performance driving school with my tii.  I was parked next to an aston martin v8 vantage.  I think the sexiest car on the road.  Anyway, friendly owner, and I was joking that my car had three ashtrays, yet his had none!  I also joked that more people were coming up to compliment my car (it was the only older car) than his.  Another guy retorted... "True, but his car is a panty remover.  Yours just attracts old men."  

 

Old men with beards I might add.  

 

Sorry dude.  Your car was kissed my a graying, balding, bearded man with an expanding midrange.  He is not afraid to say he kissed it because he has children, is married, and just loves cars that much.  He also was in his prime in the 60's/70's when free love (and 2002's) was everywhere.  He smokes joints not infrequently but is a successful man with a comfortable retirement that is about to start.  He once had a VW van, even an old 911 (sold it for something more practical when the kids went to college), and is not afraid to turn a wrench.  He has a stack of car mags in his bathroom next to the toilet.  He reads Peter Egan.  His doctor tells him he should minimize his sun exposure because he has begun to develop classic signs of sun damaged skin.  His cholesterol is high, and he is being treated for high blood pressure.  He sneaks chips and fast food when alone because his wife has him on a diet.  He worries his wife is concerned about his mild ED.  His wife wishes he would just keep his hands to himself.

Comparing the attendees at a high performance driving school with the attendees at a sunset waterfront beach party concert is a false equivalency. Totally different crowd. What would you say is the percentage of women, for example, at the former versus the latter? And no 60-ish year old man has that kind of penmanship! (I know, cuz I AM one!) No doubt in my mind that was a woman who left that note. That's my story, and I am sticking to it. To each his own fantasy!

[ndog]

^i think you are correct,It was a 20 yr old hippstir chick with a monicle,and a nickelback tee

[gliding_serpent2]

Comparing the attendees at a high performance driving school with the attendees at a sunset waterfront beach party concert is a false equivalency. Totally different crowd. What would you say is the percentage of women, for example, at the former versus the latter?

The school was overflowing with women. 70% at least. It is like a gay bar, women go because they can go knowing men will be focused on other things like torques and intake manifolds. And our track is by a beach, and music often plays. Mean ambient temperature would be lower however, which is said to lower attendance of middle aged and older women as they are more cold sensetive when it comes to plans.

Sunset waterfront beach parties are total sausage fests. Think about it. You assume there will be tons of women, as do most guys. Thus the place ends up being full of guys thinking there will be women. Women hate places full of guys thinking there will be women.

Where are the women then? Yup. High performance driving school. ;-)

Edited June 20, 2014 by gliding_serpent

[ndog]

yacht party is also good sir

[tomscat1]

The school was overflowing with women. 70% at least. It is like a gay bar, women go because they can go knowing men will be focused on other things like torques and intake manifolds. And our track is by a beach, and music often plays. Mean ambient temperature would be lower however, which is said to lower attendance of middle aged and older women as they are more cold sensetive when it comes to plans.

Sunset waterfront beach parties are total sausage fests. Think about it. You assume there will be tons of women, as do most guys. Thus the place ends up being full of guys thinking there will be women. Women hate places full of guys thinking there will be women.

Where are the women then? Yup. High performance driving school. ;-)

Nice try, but we aren't fooled that easily.    The first day I brought that E30 convertible home, back in 2008, my neighbor, a hardened Marine vet, came over to tell me how much his college age daughter wanted that car!  I couldn't sell it to him, naturally, and it has been a chick magnet ever since, for my son.  Chicks love that car.... most males prefer the coupe.  But there is no doubt it is a fun, perhaps the quintessential, summer car.    No wait... that title is held by this one:  the famous Carl Nelson/Katy Perry 1600 Cabrio by Baur!   

 

 

http://baurspotting.blogspot.com/2012/06/carl-nelson-and-his-1600-cabriolet-aug.html

Edited June 22, 2014 by tomscat1

[ndog]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxNhEkNYEGM

 

 

 

 

p cruz gets it.the first 25 of this video.

[gliding_serpent2]

Nice try, but we aren't fooled that easily. The first day I brought that E30 convertible home, back in 2008, my neighbor, a hardened Marine vet, came over to tell me how much his college age daughter wanted that car! I couldn't sell it to him, naturally, and it has been a chick magnet ever since, for my son. Chicks love that car.... most males prefer the coupe. But there is no doubt it is a fun, perhaps the quintessential, summer car. No wait... that title is held by this one: the famous Carl Nelson/Katy Perry 1600 Cabrio by Baur!

http://baurspotting.blogspot.com/2012/06/carl-nelson-and-his-1600-cabriolet-aug.html

No no no. Lets look at facts.

Look at the k perry photo. She is in a bikini jumping up and down. People are leaning all over the car, disrespecting it. Guys are there because of k perry, and because they are being paid to be there. Music video. Not a reflection of reality, but the message is... Meh, convertible, good to lean on. Boobies! Dude is in a speedo, not cool.

Now watch the p cruise film. This is a reality documentry, but this is not widley known. I know this however. We have a sedan. Girls everywhere, hot girls? Way more girls than guys. See any convertables? Nope. Bam... Every girl is in lingerie. The original edit of this reality doc had the guy doing a handbrake turn in the sedan. All the girls took notice, and bam... Clothes off. This was edited out as to make it sppesr as if the glasses were sllowing him to see through clothes... But not lingerie. How does that work? It does not. The handbrake turn did it. Logic.

Thus sedans/coupes attract hot girls, handbrake turns cause their clothes to come off, and more women like high performance driving schools than cabrios. Bearded dude kissed guys car (i admit, possibly bearded lady). All facts bro.

Edited June 22, 2014 by gliding_serpent

[Cyclone101]

My vote for the funniest thread EVER!

[tomscat1]

Ok, where to begin.  Let's start with facts, shall we?  

 

None of the 'facts' that you cited were, in fact, facts.  They were all opinion, your opinion.  Well, actually  that is not correct.  The major part of your argument is not fact at all, but FICTION!  

"Thus sedans/coupes attract hot girls (unproven speculation) , handbrake turns cause their clothes to come off (handbrake turn is non-existent), and more women like high performance driving schools than cabrios (your opinion with no basis in fact)."

 Where is the alleged handbrake turn that is the crux of your statement?    Nowhere!  It does not exist!  

 

And therefore neither does your 60 year old male car kisser, who is the product of an equally specious argument, and who is entirely a product of your imagination!  

 

Game, set, match.  The car kisser is a female of indeterminate age, but clearly female, based on the penmanship, the content of the message, and the idyllic setting. Once she set eyes on that classic convertible on such a romantic summer evening with music filling the air, she was overcome with emotion, and poured her heart out onto that piece of paper.  No other conclusion is possible.  

 

I rest my case.  

 

 

Addendum:  

The band:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Hoolios/157168784337594?fref=photo

A review of the band:

https://www.facebook.com/157168784337594/photos/a.272911746096630.69795.157168784337594/691041210950346/?type=1&theater

 

The venue:

https://www.facebook.com/lobsterrolls

 

Here is a pic of the actual event:

  https://www.facebook.com/157168784337594/photos/a.272911746096630.69795.157168784337594/687738424613958/?type=1&theater

[gliding_serpent2]

 

Here is a pic of the actual event:

  https://www.facebook.com/157168784337594/photos/a.272911746096630.69795.157168784337594/687738424613958/?type=1&theater

I see only men... middle aged men, with expanding mid-lines, many with beards.  Sausage fest.  Could you make this any easier for me.  Beach concert = sausage fest. Bearded man kissed the car. 

 

In regards to your blatant left wing socialist attacking of my facts and smearing their good name as mere "opinion" or "imagination"... let me tell you this... my facts have far more "heart" than your facts ever did.  Science and evidence are not heart.  And what this great country needs is more heart, and less criticism of this great land!  Look inside your heart.  Stop listening to all of the elitist "truths" and start believing in your heart, start believing in your gut.  

 

You and I both know in our heart, and in our gut (or maybe that was the chilli...) that the handbrake turn that you question DID happen.  But the socialist elites want to deny us of the truth.  They manipulate us.  They tell us guns and open carry is bad, just like they try to deny us, the heroes of this country, the power that the handbrake turn has on women.  They don't want us to have this power over women... so they brainwash people just like you... to deny the power... to deny the very existence... of the handbrake turn.  

 

I beg you, stop thinking with your head, and start thinking with your heart... and or gut.   

 

p.s. here is another review of the concert.  I found it using search...

 

The Hoolios beach concert review

Edited June 23, 2014 by gliding_serpent

[resra]

I did it! I kissed the 325i while I was wearing my tights and while I was kissing the BMW, I asked a lady passing by to write a note!

[Conserv]

I did it! I kissed the 325i while I was wearing my tights and while I was kissing the BMW, I asked a lady passing by to write a note!

That's more than enough closure for me. It's time to move on!

Steve

[gliding_serpent2]

I did it! I kissed the 325i while I was wearing my tights and while I was kissing the BMW, I asked a lady passing by to write a note!

Check and mate

[resra]

I had to! After Toby talked down on my post about how much I loved my side draft setup! It's just a the noise nothing else. So I had to put on my tights and kiss some e30s.

[tomscat1]

I did it! I kissed the 325i while I was wearing my tights and while I was kissing the BMW, I asked a lady passing by to write a note!

Whoa!  A Tag Team!  I totally didn't see THAT one coming!  But I am glad we got this sorted out.